Upbeat

You enjoy being around others and others enjoy being around you. You have a "live and let live" attitude; because you know that no one's perfect, you are forgiving and happy to give the benefit of the doubt.

You don't feel the need to be controversial or express contrary opinions all the time. You see no reason to go around rubbing people the wrong way.

Passionate

You are in touch with your emotions, and sometimes you react before you think. The good news: you don't tamp down your feelings. The bad news: you sometimes say or do things that you later wish you could take back.

You do not live your life on an even keel; you do not go for long periods without experiencing some mood swings.

Aesthetic

You appreciate art, beauty, and design; you know that they are not superficial but absolutely crucial to living the good life. You have good taste, and you're proud of it. Those with a high score on the "aesthetic" trait are often employed in literary or artistic professions, enjoy domestic activities — doing things around the house — and are enthusiastic about the arts, reading, and travel.

You don't think it's pretentious to be moved by art and beauty. You're not one of those who believe it doesn't matter what something looks like as long as it does its job.

Sympathetic

You have a knack for knowing what's going on in the hearts and minds of those around you, without their having to tell you explicitly. People tend to turn to you with their problems because they know you care, and that you will likely offer good advice and a helping hand.

You do not feel that people with sad stories are just looking for attention, or have brought their problems upon themselves.

Curious

You like to get to the bottom of things. You're not content knowing what someone did; you want to know why they did it.

You don't simply take things as they are and move on; you're not content skimming along on the surface; you don't feel you're wasting time by digging for the meaning of things.

Scrupulous

You are an honest, fair person. You don't lie or cheat to get ahead. You treat others with respect and hope for the same in return.

You do not feel that you are above the rules that everyone else follows; you are definitely not willing to do whatever it takes to get ahead.

Tender

You are gentle with others, both physically and emotionally. You are careful not to upset people and go out of your way to find the nicest way to say something. You naturally focus on the fact that the world is full of wonderful people, places, and things. More often than not, people with a high score on the "tender" trait enjoy spending time with children, love romantic movies, and are enthusiastic about making the world a better place.

You don't think of yourself as tough-minded or gruff, nor do you need to be seen as some kind of objective source of truth and rationality.

Introspective

You like your own company; you're a very interesting person. Tracking your own mental processes, knowing what you're thinking and why you do what you do, is important to you. Often, what's going on in your mind is more compelling than what's going on outside. For the most part, those with a high score on the "introspective" trait enjoy reading, taking long walks, learning new things, and other solitary activities.

You are not someone who is constantly looking to be among a group of friends; you never feel bored when you are by yourself.

Original

You are constantly coming up with new ideas. For you, the world as it exists is just a jumping-off place; what's going on inside your mind is often more interesting than what's going on outside.

You don't feel that the road to success is to be a realist and stick to the program; you never stop yourself from coming up with new ideas or telling the world what you're thinking about.

Reserved

You are somewhat shy, or at least unwilling to spend all your time socializing. With you it's true that "still waters run deep," which is why many of your acquaintances never get to know you well.

You are not always ready to talk at the drop of a hat. Whether you're in the office or at a party, you're not likely to be found gabbing away in the middle of a group of people.

I've made up my mind
Don't need to think it over
If I'm wrong, I am right
Don't need to look no further
This ain't lust
I know this is love

-Adele

"Do not judge or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you."

- Matthew 7:1-2

the worst feeling ever is not knowing whether you should wait or give up

William Shakespeare said "expectation is the root of all heartache."

But, we can't live without expectation. Then, life is all about having expectations and dreams, hurt, and we, however, keep moving on despite the ache , isn't it?

you're just so random as always.
how should i believe you?
which part of you should i believe?

i wonder why Priests and Hajj preach like as if they're goin into a war? are you spreading God's words or provocative words?

i don't like priests who pray for others unequally and still dare telling us to love each other equally.

doing half-evil things is worse than that of whole-evil things.

nostalgia(2)

nostalgia (1)

slapped

hmmmpphhh...

i feel like God has slapped me.
i just can't content myself since the minute i walk out from my room right until this second. i'm overwhelmed with guilt.

so, it was when i just closed the door and walk a few meters from my house when an old man - he's a little bit fat - called me. he said:"son, please give me some food, i am very hungry." surprised, i just nodded my head and smiled while my feet kept walking. i felt a little pity for him but i just kept rationalizing my mind by saying "that's fine. millions begged and i don't even know if he's honest. what if he just pretended being poor?"

the routine of my mornings is picking kines up at her house and then dea, and the three of us will go to the campus together. so after i'd waited for kines for a while, she came up and we started to walk to dea's house.

BUT, just a few step we had walked, a man with a black plastic bag in his right hand ,about 27 years old, approached me. "son, are you busy? can you help me for a while?" he asked me. i was not that in a hurry so i just said yes. He then offered me his black plastic bag, "i have this 5 kilos of rice, would you please buy it?" i was confused. i know he is in trouble, and the scene was just like in a reality show named "TOLONG!". and i also have untouched rice in my room. i spontaneously said sorry to him that i can't buy it because i have lots of rice in my house and i haven't eaten it yet. he looked so disappointed and he was just about to CRY!! he then told me: "okay, that's fine. my wife was about to give birth and i couldn't pay the hospital." and he walked away! i was speechless and i just could stare at him walking away.

all the way to the campus, i mused.

what happened to me this morning?! i just started the day and there had been two people asked me to helped them and i just rejected them! am i heartless or what? moreover the second man. what if something bad happen to his wife because he couldn't pay the midwife? and if it really happened, it was because of me ignoring him.

then an idea just popped up in my mind: i could have bought the rice and gave it to the man begging for food! or at least i could give the money to the man without taking the rice! fool me!!

well i hope they're fine right now. i hope the old man can eat i hope the man's wife can give birth safely and so the newborn baby and he could pay the fee. sorry for not helping you :(

we're smarter than you guys! :P

Now I can feel how art students and engineering students are different.

We had a congratulating party for our seniors yesterday after graduation ceremony. The party was made by the youngest class which is my class, 2010. Well, the party was failed. But I did have an unforgettable moment on the welcoming of the graduates. It was true that we, art students, are brutal.

On the welcoming, each majors stood in each row, with their own preparation and shouting their own yells. FYI, there are 9 engineering majors at Itenas, while there are only 3 art and design majors which are Product Design, Visual Communication Design, and Interior Design. And, compared to them our students are much less and half of them are girls, unlike them which is like 90% of the are boys. So, we were truly lose in amount and voice.

What interesting was it was we who gained attention from people. Yes, they were much louder. We were much more creative and smart, tho. More than 1000 engineering students in their own black organizational uniforms lifted their hand and shouted loudly. But, around 200 of us shouted with our costumes, we danced, we sang, we played music.

our "dancer"

Art and Design majors have always had tradition to be creative and out of ordinary. We always have our own themes for welcoming graduates party. This year my major Product Design took ALOHA, Visual Communication Design took Halloween, and Interior Design took Sundanese. We never care what people think about us. All we care is that we have fun.They might think we are crazy, impolite, unethical, and stupid. But, right there, we proved who were smarter.

Visual Communication Design students

We at first shouted at the same time the engineers shouted. And the result was as what we had expected, we lose. So, we had our own strategy. We sat, and shut our mouth when engineers shouted without taking a glance on them. When they were taking breath, we shouted our yell as loud as we can, hit our drums and gamelan as hard as we can, danced as attractive as we can. As we started to get tired we would sit again and let them shout. We would shouted again when they started getting tired.

And, what made it crazier is that we were not just shouting our yells. We read a PRAYER and sang NATIONAL SONGS loudly! It was great to see that they couldn't fight back and they just shouted "sampah sampah sampah". And we read another prayer and, again, they couldn't shout back! HAHAH!

leading the "choir"

That gave me conclusion, tho:
Engineering students have always been boasting themselves that they are intelligent, smart and logical. And looked down on Art and Design as a stupid, illogical, ignorant, and crazy people. But, in fact, we were much smarter and logical. Yes we are brutal, but we have the art of brutality and not conservative like engineers. We were just people who are blessed with perfection in the balance of imagination and logic, art and science :D

Men have always been looked down for being childish, immature, liar, heartless, bla bla bla. Am just sick for always hearing that hypocrisy of women.

I think the era has changed. May be this is what people call female emancipation: women, in fact, are not better than men. They are not less childish, ignorant, heartless, liar, bipolar, unstable, got no commitment.

I think it's just an outdated women who still think about men lowly and praise women's balanced emotional sensitivity, commitment and maturity - which are just a few women have that character.


well, a little reference right here.

And this video might be the perfect speech.

there's one second right there, in your life, that blinds you and it changes your life - your whole life.

...

hanya satu pintaku
tuk memandang langit biru
dalam dekap ayah dan ibu.

apabila ini
hanya sebuah mimpi
ku selalu berharap
dan tak pernah terbangun

...

the old-school romance is much more beautiful than how most people love (or like) each other today.

we won't be able to feel the real sensation of falling in love if we easily and keep changing the person we admire. once we know he/she doesn't has no feeling for us then we leave him/her without giving any struggle to catch the person.

or straightforwardly showing our feeling like a maniac saying his/her name like every one minute at social-networking sites, at our books, or our table.


i think i love the way how people keep secret the one they have a crush on from people, especially from the one they admire. i love the way how people trying to get the heart whom they love slowly, secretly, mysteriously. i mean, it's just the sensation right there i love, the feeling like your chest gonna explode, biting your lip when you fail with the approach, trying to get closer without wanting the person to know that you fall in love with him/her.

the anti-social me

alright. it's been a month i study here in Itenas and everything goes pretty well i can say. since the first week and i was pretty stressed out for having no friends, now i've had pretty many of them - not so many, tho.

but, there's just one thing i find it hard to let go: the anti-social me. not a real anti-social, may be individualist is a better word to describe. i don't know why i feel like an anti-social. i spend most of my days alone. i work alone in my table while others chat and joke around. i go home alone while others hang out somewhere. i stay in my own room by myself while others gather and laugh a lot in the other room.

may be i'm too much an individualist? but i'm not that individualist. i hang out much with my friends back then in high school. or is it me that can't adapt and go along well with my new friends? may be.

i always say i can live without you, but in the end i'll always go back to you.

sorry dad, mom.

when waiting makes everything worse and speaking straightforwardly creates disaster, what should i do?

I love being religious and so the religious people. But when it comes about those who keep relating everything in this world to God, or their religion, it's sickening.

Jakarta is sinking because we're getting farther from God? Come on! it's 2010! no wonder Indonesia is lagging behind!

Even you doubt that it's fine for non-Islam people to talk in Arabian! Arab is not all about Islam! The civilization developed there and so with other religions!

"Siapa yang berhak menilai kebaikan kita? Mengapa kita melebihi Tuhan dalam menghakimi sesama?"

-Alex Tata, Kompas

Wakatobi, Southeast of Celebes

another place I definitely want to go after Raja Ampat! Well, it has a more beautiful undersea (it is said to have 85% of world's coral species), but Raja Ampat has a better view and panaronama, tho.







They even have the fluorescent diving! with a certain kind of light all the corals, fish, and other specieses down there become a theater of light! how will you reject its offer to enjoy the beauty of pre-historic age?

grateful I was not accepted at ITB

thanks God for not letting me go to San Francisco
thanks God for showing me the way to Bandung
thanks God for not putting me into ITB
thanks God for putting me into Itenas
thanks God for the great lecturers
thanks God for the amazing lectures since the first day at Itenas

I don't know what's Your plan
I don't know how You're working on me
I don't know how You see my future

but I'm grateful for everything I have until today
I'm grateful for all the journey I've gone through

I believe You have a great plan on me.


I DO REALLY LOVE ITENAS!! I'VE MET THE GREATEST TEACHERS OF ALL!!

"Surely there is a future, and your hope will not be cut off"
-Proverbs 23:18

Praying doesn't make you a saint any more than standing in an airport makes you an airplane
-Paulo Coelho

it is the 4th day and i think i had made a pretty good progress.

this afternoon after class we hanged out at workshop. most of the boys and 2 girls. just played around and had fun. (in fact, most of us couldn't go home as it was raining heavily and we were trapped at the workshop with a horribly hungry stomach.)

we moved to a cheap small restaurant when the rain stopped. there were 12 of us. i tried to jumped in so that i could know them better and making friends with the other people i hadn't know.

well, it didn't go pretty good. it's hard for me to join the conversation. and worse, they used sundanese frequently that i didn't understand them. but it went better as our conversation went farther, tho. i could join the conversation and we laughed together. pretty fun. it was like 1-1,5 hour until we moved to the workshop again to meet some of our seniors.


overall, everything went pretty good. i got pretty many friends at once. such a progress for me! yet, there's something i gotta pay to make friends, i think: my health. i just can't imagine hanging out with them all the time. there are 36 students in my class and 8 of them are women meaning 28 the rest are men. and, it is like around 20 of the men smoke. they smoke whenever they got time, during the break, or when we're hanging out afterclass. and for this first time, i couldn't stop coughing, i kept holding my breath and blowing the smokes. and when i got home, even until now, my throat feels terrible! i just can't imagine i will be with them for 4 years. how my lungs will be?

“Pernah kau berpikir kawan? kalau terkadang kekayaan adalah kutukan.
itu yang sering aku pikirkan tentang bumi ini.. tentang bangsa ini.. dan tentang kampung halamanku ini. semua milik kami tidak pernah betul-betul kami nikmati.
Kami disini hanya menjadi penonton. atau hanya menjadi kuli. bahkan kesalahan orang yang mengeruk tanah kamipun harus kami yang menanggungnya.” - Sang Pemimpi, 2010

i think strong people are not those who are physically strong, not those who can lift up to the heaviest weigh, not those who can fight with many people alone, not those who can beat another person in just one punch, and so on. instead, i think the strongest person is the one who can live alone. what i mean alone is, alone-no one wants him and he has no one to lean on.

i think the strong people are those who are bullied, unwanted, deserted, and abandoned, but still alive. those who can carry all the sorrow, sadness, loneliness, hatred, happiness, love, all by himself without having no one to share with, but still loving and caring.


and, therefore, i'm obviously weak. i'm a weakling. i can't stand being solitary. i can't stand having no one beside me. i can't stand having no one to talk to and to share all my feelings.


hence, i really appreciate those who are strong. eventhough no one recognizes them.

can i survive?

it's been the 5th day i moved to bandung.

all new environment. new society. new people. new rules. new culture. new blahblahblah...

i'm a bit stressed out right here. i know it's still in Indonesia and it's nothing like a remote city out of Java or even some other countries. the fact is that it is just a few hundred kilometer away from Jakarta and one of the largest city in Indonesia.

yet, still, i find it really different from my last environment, where it is like 99% of my friends are pretty the same with me. they have the same religion, the same way of making friends, hanging out, flirting, cultures, and so on. my campus is still in Indonesia and it feels like somewhere in another country. i feel like i'm an alien.

it has been hard for me in adapting myself into new societies. but this one's much harder than i thought. like, boys smoke, like 95 percent of them and i don't. those who smoke have chance to get to know each other better, but since i can't stand being among horrible smokes, i don't join in therefore it's hard for me to know them.


it's been the third day at campus and i just knew 6 people. can i survive in this 4 year college?

i am serious about saving up money up to 50million rupiah. Well, I know I won't have it in just 1 or 2 years. even if i can save like 200K per month, it will be just 2,4million per year meaning it needs 20 years to reach 50million.

but, of course, i will have my own income sooner or later. well, it will be in 5 years at the latest until i have my own income and career. and, more, i hope by taking industrial design i can make something before i graduate and earn lots of money from there.

my mom told me not to save money by reducing my meal portion. but, i think i will, tho! sorry mom :P

I wonder why Christian and Islam are stereotyped to be always fighting despite the fact that they both are highly related and bonded?

Again and again. Majority and minority.

Why does it have to be majority to take the power?
Why can they freely decide even if they're wrong?
Why can't they let minority have their right?
Why do they always abate minority's right and power?

Do we minority have the right to speak up?

We are voiceless.
We, minority, are powerless.
Rights seem to be just a formality.
An alibi to shadow the harassment against minority.

The third largest democracy huh?
I don't see Indonesia deserves the title.

Democracy is yet to learn.

why won't you answer me?
your silence is slowly killing me.
girl your really got me bad.

i am in misery.

Saya akan terus berupaya membangun negeri ini menjadi lebih baik sampai negeri ini dikuasai Syariat Islam atau syariat-syariat lainnya, karena di saat itulah sudah tidak ada penghargaan terhadap golongan lainnya.

Di luar cita-cita seluruh rakyat Indonesia termasuk saya, yaitu berupa kesejahteraan ekonomi bagi seluruh rakyat, hanya ada satu cita-cita utama yang saya dambakan terhadap Indonesia: terhapusnya sekat-sekat pemisah antara suku, ras, dan agama. Negara ini bisa terbentuk karena adanya rasa persaudaraan antara tiap golongan masyarakat di seluruh Indonesia yang jumlahnya bukan hanya belasan atau puluhan, melainkan ratusan. Tanpa ada rasa persaudaraan itu negara ini tidak akan bisa terbentuk.

Namun sepertinya keadaan semakin memburuk. Saya heran, kenapa generasi muda sekarang bukannya menjadi semakin terbuka malah menjadi semakin konservatif. Mudah sekali diprovokasi dengan nama agama. Bisa-bisanya mengancam keamanan dan bahkan membunuh orang lain hanya karena mereka itu dibilang "kafir" oleh pemimpin agama mereka.

Etnis Tionghoa pun dianggap alien perusak bangsa - etnis minoritas dan pendatang yang harus diusir dari bumi Indonesia. Akan tetapi tidak hanya mereka para rasis pembenci etnis Tionghoa saja yang salah. Saya sebagai salah seorang dari etnis Tionghoa pun salah dan tidak kalah munafik karena selalu melabel orang-orang yang katanya penduduk asli Indonesia (padahal mereka pun pendatang) itu kotor dan bau.

Sejak kecil saya (mungkin teman-teman saya juga sama) sudah diajarkan bahwa kita berbeda. Kita Tionghoa dan mereka pribumi. Kita pintar mereka tidak pintar. Kita pintar berdagang mereka pemalas. Mungkin mereka pun sudah diajarkan bahwa mereka sopan kita tidak punya sopan santun. Mereka rendah hati kita sombong. Mereka tidak pelit kita pelit. Itulah yang tertanam di otak kita. Atau agama kitalah yang benar sementara mereka salah. Agama kitalah yang akan membawa kita ke surga sementara mereka tidak.

Akan tetapi, tinggal menjadi alien di Bandung di antara mereka pun memberikan saya pelajaran berharga. Kita sama. Betapa kita sama-sama membenci teroris yang memakai topeng Islam, sama-sama membenci FPI yang merusak mengatasnamakan Allah. Betapa kita sama-sama tidak suka dijelek-jelekan dan diperlakukan berbeda.

Sampai kapan kita akan melihat diri kita berbeda? Sampai kapan kita terus memperlebar jurang di antara kita? Berkata ini pun saya munafik karena saya, secara sadar ataupun tidak, juga rasis. Namun saya tidak mau melihat Indonesia terpecah belah hanya karena golongan tertentu yang memprovokasi untuk saling membenci. Oleh karenanya saya pun akan memperbaiki sikap saya dan meluruskan pandangan saya dari bias subjektivitas.

Apakah kita punya hak menghakimi benar salah atau sesat tidak suatu kepercayaan? Bukankah itu hak Dia di atas sana karena Dialah yang memilih suka tidaknya dengan cara kita memuji dan memuliakan namaNya? Siapa sangka ketika di akhir zaman nanti umat yang kita injak-injaklah yang akan masuk ke Surga, Nirvana, Moksha atau apapun itu?

Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.

- Marcus Aurelius

I was born with an enormous need for affection and a terrible need to give it.

- Audrey Hepburn

It’s always more intriguing to imagine what’s happening, as opposed to seeing everything because then you can use your imagination. I always wanted to be at a distance.

- Sofia Coppola

Just watched the videos of the hijacked bus in Manila. 8 hostages died in that catastrophe.

There was a video showing the bus driver tried to escape from the bus and he did it. Glad that he successfully escaped. He did it for his life, for his safety. He must felt a great great relieve.

And.. the next video told me about the hijacker, who was a fired captain in the army, sprayed a gunfire. He killed some hostages.


What would I do if I was in that bus, and there was an option: I ran, and I was safe but others would be killed because my escape or I stayed, killed, and the others would be safe?

Never know the answer though. Answering it won't be as easy as doing it.


Anyway.. I am very sorry for the killed hostages. RIP.

I have no problem with it. But it becomes a problem for me if others have a problem with it.

how can I get here?

How can I get here? At this point of life.

I've been living for 18 years; well I'm still so young but there are lots of unlucky teens out there can't get reach this age - I got my right to be grateful. Coming from Lampung at the age of 8. Got into St. Laurensia and held back in the 3rd grade for another year since I was too young to get into 4th grade. Transformed to be a go-green boy in the 9th grade. Becoming a nationalist too a year later. Lately my religious view grew to be more moderate. Hating conservatives. Wanted to major Environmental Science in US in grade 11 after the soccer-player-dream. Confused. Altered to Urban Studies. Confused, again. It then became Hospitality. Again, confused. Now decided to take Industrial Design.

Targeted ITB. Went to Bandung for a month for drawing lesson. The test day came and failed. Depressed. Boosted. Back to Bandung for another lesson for 3 weeks, now, targeted Itenas. Accepted. And just a week ago doubted with my decision in taking industrial design.


I know my life is not that hard. I'm lucky enough to have a caring family, eat 3 times a day (or even more), healthy body, lots of friends, good school, good house, and more. There are millions of teens about my age or even younger who have no parents and have to grab a weapon to fight in a war; bloodlust. Or those living on the streets begging for money everyday and can't go to school and have a normal teen life. I'm lucky.

But that's why I am thinking.. just tell me how can I get here?

Funny. I read an article titled: The government of Jakarta's promise to free Jakarta from flood is never committed.

Well, who dumb all those rubbishes to the river or water ditches or where-ever-you-want?! Who built illegal houses along the river bank?! Who concreted the entire house yard?!

Come on! The government can't do it alone!

saha nuhur festival: body painting

saha nuhur festival: sea turtle release

bandung

Englishman In New York - Sting

If, "Manners maketh man" as someone said
Then he's the hero of the day
It takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile
Be yourself no matter what they say

Modesty, propriety can lead to notoriety
You could end up as the only one
Gentleness, sobriety are rare in this society
At night a candle's brighter than the sun

Takes more than combat gear to make a man
Takes more than a license for a gun
Confront your enemies, avoid them when you can
A gentleman will walk but never run

If, "Manners maketh man" as someone said
Then he's the hero of the day
It takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile
Be yourself no matter what they say

I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York
I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York

A Love Letter To Indonesia

Guys, read this. See how great Indonesia is and be proud to be Indonesian. Don't be so skeptical about Indonesia as we actually have an amazing and incredible country.

source: http://mojotrotters.com/2010/08/a-love-letter-to-indonesia/

You had me at “Selamat datang”.

We’ve been together for month now, and it’s time we had that talk. I don’t know where you see this going, but I could say “the hell with it” to the rest of my year-long trip and stay here with you.

I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak you out. You didn’t really expect that, huh? Oh, stop giggling and listen.

Yes, you have beautiful beaches, scenic mountains, and hallowed temples, but it’s not just your body I fell in love with.

I feel really good with you. You treat me so well, and it’s not because of my money. Most times you don’t even ask for money. You just like being around me.

You give me a lift on a motorcycle in the rain then take me home to give me a dry shirt and some hot coffee. You talk to me on the train and take time off work the next day to show me around town. You teach me that it’s idiotic to keep a schedule, since you stop me every 30 meters to talk.

No, I don’t mind that you ask me 20 times a day where I’m from and how long I’ve been here. I don’t mind getting the occasional mouthful of truck exhaust and being nearly deafened by 100 passing motorbikes. You’re like a lover that farts in bed because she’s so comfortable and self-assured. You secretly know I’ll love you no matter what.

You don’t bother learning English because you’re too smart for that. You know that if I make the effort to speak your language, I’ll be rewarded in spades: a motorcycle ride through your narrow alleys, a free coconut sweet, your adorable laughter.

You’re religious, but not insufferably. You trim and mould religion to suit your lifestyle, not the other way around. You wear your Muslim headscarf with tight jeans and heels (and have no idea how confusingly hot that is). And you’re a good sport about it: you train monkeys to bow to Allah in town squares then poke them in the butt with a drumstick.

So you’re not exactly the best chef. Your food is good, but it can get pretty repetitive and sometimes outright disturbing. What the hell is this? A flattened and deep-fried lung? And yet, you manage to make me feel like a gastronomical Indiana Jones when your ugly streets explode to life with a million food stalls that tug me 10 different ways with their peanutty garlic grease.

But for God’s sake, go easy on the sugar. I can’t even taste the tea in this glass of diabetes. And do you have to smoke your clove cigarettes while you drive the bus? It’s not exactly well-ventilated in here.

Oh, whatever. Just go ahead, take my picture and add me on Facebook. I won’t understand anything you say there, but that’s ok. After all, our relationship is complicated.

is it to respect yourselves or to abate our rights?

Si Jadul Bernama Budi Pekerti

source: blogombal.org

Misalkan saya sedang berpuasa mungkin puasa saya batal gara-gara gangguan pagi hari tadi. Orang bilang itu soal sepele tapi nyatanya dalam sepuluh kilometer berikutnya saya masih membatin, tidak dapat menikmati radio, dan istri saya pun tak dapat mengajak bercakap lebih banyak.

Penyebabnya? Ketika mengedrop si sulung di pelataran sekolah maka saya pun mengantre. Saya tahu bahwa mobil depan berisi tiga anak.

Saya juga paham bahwa sebagian anak yang diantar tak diajari orangtuanya untuk berkemas sebelum turun. Akibatnya antrean pun menjadi lama gara-gara kedua nona kecil itu sibuk sebelum kaki menginjakkan tanah. Bahkan setelah di luar mobil pun masih sibuk ini dan itu padahal bawaanya tak seribet orang yang akan pergi sebulan.

Setelah dua anak usia SMP itu keluar, lalu melenggang meninggalkan Toyota Innova keperakan, giliran penumpang di jok depan. Tak terlihat sosoknya. Tapi pintu kiri sudah terbuka sejak mobil berhenti.

Saya masih sabar. Istri saya yang tak sabar, meminta saya mengklakson. Saya menolak. Ini di halaman sekolah dan mobil depan mungkin punya masalah.

Lama kelamaan antrean yang terlihat di spion saya kian panjang. Dan saya tahu, itu berarti buntutnya di jalan sana sudah menghambat bus kota, mobil penumpang, dan bahkan motor.

Saya kedipkan lampu. Tak ada reaksi. Klakson yang tinggal pencet bukanlah alasan untuk membunyikannya kapan pun. Saya minta istri memanggil satpamwan, empat meter dari posisi kami. Tapi sang satpamwan, yang setiap jam masuk dan bubar sekolah harus mengatir kendaraan, itu masih asyik ngobrol dengan seseorang sambil tertawa-tawa.

Antrean kian mengular. Dari belakang sudah terdengar suara klakson. Mobil depannya ikut berbunyi. Untung tak sampai bising.

Lantas saya pun berpikir kalau saya tak mengklakson, sementara si satpamwan tak peduli, maka sumbatan tak terbuka. Apa boleh bikin. Klakson pun saya bunyikan. Sekali. Dengan pencetan mengambang. Tak ada reaksi.

Saya keluarkan kepala dari mobil dengan harapan pengemudi mobil depan memahami masalah. Kaca mobilnya tetap tertutup. Saya klakson lagi. Seperti cara tadi. Tak ada reaksi. Saya ulangi lagi. Tak ada reaksi. Saya ulangi lagi.

Saya tahu mobil itu tidak mogok. Saya tahu, dan semua orang tahu, bahwa di sisi kiri ada tempat untuk berhenti lebih lama. Tapi tidak dia lakukan.

Akhinya keluarlah penumpang dari jok depan mobil itu. Seorang siswi SMA. Sambil berjalan dia bersungut-sungut, dan menengok ke arah saya dan istri, “Kan tas saya putus.”

Saya lihat tali tas Kipling hitamnya memang terlepas. Waduh Neng, kenapa nggak turun dari tadi, menepi, lantas bikin betul itu tali? Tali tas putus di sebuah pelataran sekolah telah merugikan pengguna jalan raya.

Mungkin saya berlebihan. Tapi dalam kesal, dan setelah meneruskan perjalanan, saya merenung dan jadilah judul di atas. Tentang kata lama bernama budi pekerti. Kata jadul. Sekarang pengucapnya akan dianggap aneh atau melucu.

Jalanan dan cara berkendara(an) adalah potret sosial kita. Misalnya menjalankan mobil secara pelan di lajur kanan, atau malah sekalian mengangkangi garis jalan, masih ditambah berhal-halo pula, bahkan ber-SMS. Sering kita jumpai, naik sepeda motor pun sambil SMS-an.

Mau tambah contoh? Lihatlah di dekat gerbang masuk mal dan hotel, ada saja mobil yang berhenti lama, dengan maupun tanpa lampu hazard, tapi jika mobilnya bagus maka satpam tak menghalau, karena mobil itu menunggu tuan dan nyonya yang tak segera keluar dari mal. Tuan, nyonya, dan nona sudah menelepon sopir sebelum tiba di pintu keluar tapi dalam perjalanan mereka tergoda etalase; itu pun sambil menelepon.

Saya rasa ada yang tak beres dalam masyarakat kita. Budi pekerti, yang salah satunya adalah kepatutan berperilaku dalam hubungannya dengan kepentingan orang lain, sudah tak dianggap penting.

Saya menduga salah satu sebab adalah kebingungan kita dalam menempatkan mana yang privat dan mana yang publik. Di rumah sendiri kita menjaga kebersihan selayaknya rumah sakit bagus, tetapi di ruang publik boleh semaunya karena merasa sudah ada petugas yang membersihkannya. Dalam bentuk yang sederhana: mobil sendiri harus bersih sehingga sampah harus dibuang ke luar tanpa hirau tempat.

Di sisi lain, sebagian dari kita lebih sibuk dengan kesalehan yang masih egosentris, kurang altruistis. Hubungan dengan yang Maha Tinggi lebih utama ketimbang urusan bersama di ruang publik — padahal mestinya paralel. Sebagai orang saleh sebagian dari kita menganggap pemerkosaan terhadap bahu jalan tol bukan dosa, begitu pula dengan menyerobot antrean di segala urusan — terlebih di lampu setopan.

Jangan-jangan korupsi pun tak dianggap dosa, apalagi jika pelakunya saleh dan sering menyumbang rumah ibadah, sehingga para pembimbing iman akan mengatakan, “Jangan menjadi hakim untuk perkara yang tidak kita ketahui. Saudara bukan KPK.”

Dalam sebuah obrolan, beberapa teman mengutamakan kesalehan pribadi (masing-masing sesuai Ajaran yang dianutnya), dan salah seorang dengan tegas mengatakan (kurang lebih), “Orang yang bener dalam kehidupan duniawi tapi jarang ke rumah ibadah, malah suka berselingkuh dan nonton striptis, maka dosanya berlipat. Kalau secara pribadi religius dan saleh tapi di luaran dianggap sering rugikan orang lain itu karena dia korban sistem, padahal sebagai orang hidup kita harus nyesuain diri sama masyarakat. Itulah gunanya beribadah.”

Saya bukan ahli surga dan neraka. Tapi bagi saya hubungan pramarital maupun ekstramarital itu urusan pribadi, tidak merugikan orang lain di luar pasangan itu. Yang merugikan orang lain, misalnya, ya itu tadi, orang yang sembarangan di jalan. :)

As you pass from sunlight into darkness and back again every hour and a half, you become startlingly aware how artificial are thousands of boundaries we've created to separate and define. And for the first time in your life you feel in your gut the precious unity of the Earth and all the living things it supports.

— Russell 'Rusty' Schweikart, returning from Apollo 9

When old dreams die, new ones come to take their place. God pity a one-dream man.

— Esther Goddard, reading from her late husband's diary to the AP just prior to the launch of Apollo 11.

this is one of the things i really am confused about women (maybe mostly indonesians and, well, some men do):

they really wanted to be slim, have a beautiful body, jealous with all the celebrities out there wondering why they have an amazing body. they know the answer which is having a regular exercise besides getting on diet. but, still, all they do is consuming a very small amount of food (without considering the lack of nutrition) and gossiping on PE class.

I'm not good at acting. I just love being frank and blunt.

i hate 'majority-minority' ' native-nonnative'

terry - janji manis

oh dunia ini penuh kepalsuan
mungkinkah tiada keikhlasan
apakah ini suatu pembalasan
ku sadar kebesaranMu Tuhan
aku bagai seorang
kembara jalanan
terombang-ambing di lautan gelora
ku cari kebahagiaan
dan untuk menopang kasih
mungkinkah suratan
hidup kan selalu sendirian


hati membeku mengingatkan
kata janji manisMu
ku dilambung angan-angan
belaian kasih sayang suci dariMu
oh kejamnya
lidah tidak bertulang
ucapan cinta mengiris kalbu
ku kan pergi membawa diri
cinta di hati terkubur lagi


jika ku pahami mengapa terjadi
peristiwa pahit menggores hati
perjalanan hidup ini sudah tertulis
ku tempuhi dengan kesabaran
ku sadar kebesaranMu Tuhan

Two weeks ago Indonesians were shocked because of the picture of a Balinese underwater temple. Well, how could be there a temple built down there? Here is the picture.



Mostly, there were two reactions: first those who were amazed. second those who didn't believe it. Well, I can understand it. It's pretty impossible to build a temple down there. How could they put the bricks one by one at that place?

But there were two things that made me sad:
first: the minister of tourism didn't know about the temple and worse, he did NOT even believe it exists
second: it was built in 2005, and FUNDED by Australia, and Australian tourists have known it before it surprised Indonesians.